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Welcome to oneargumentplease.org, how can I help?
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I’d like an argument pls
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Just to clarify, were you after an aggressive
disagreement kind of argument, or a series of
statements that form a logical conclusion?
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Yeh, the first one
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Ah, terribly sorry but we only offer the second kind
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uwotm8?
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We’re a service provided by schoolofthought.org offering advice on arguments in the philosophical sense. Again, we do apologise for the confusion and wish you luck in finding some form of verbal conflict
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Well, perhaps you should change ur name then
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Perhaps, however, it should be noted that the kind of
argument you’re after is merely a bastardisation of the
original meaning of the word and so it might be argued
(see what I did there?) that in terms of etymological
precedence, the kind of arguments we provide
information on are a more relevant form
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Look, you pretentious bastard, everyone knows what a bloody argument is. If you don’t offer arguments, then you shouldn’t have the word ‘argument’ in your web address.
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Well, see, you just formed an argument right there!
I mean, it was crude and poorly articulated, but you
created a logical structure comprising a series of
statements that culminated in a conclusion. We all
make arguments all the time without really realising it.
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Now, where it gets interesting is that you used what is known as a logical fallacy, namely the bandwagon fallacy,
to justify your conclusion. Logical fallacies are like flaws in reasoning, and so it might be said that your argument is weak.
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Might it just? You know what else might be said? It might be said that you’re a jerky McJerk face
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So, a lot of people would think that you just committed another fallacy, specifically the Ad Hominem fallacy
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A lot of people would think that you SUUUUUCK
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However, because you weren’t forming an argument it doesn’t qualify as a fallacy; instead you were just
reacting with a juvenile personal insult. To be a fallacy you would have to do something like call my character
into question so as to undermine my argument or conclusion. You see, fallacies relate to the logical
coherence and structure of an argument - something has to be wrong with the flow of logic. Interestingly,
this means that you can use fallacies to argue for something that is actually a true claim, just as you can
create an entirely coherent argument – with no fallacies at all – to support a claim that is false! This is
why we have the Fallacy fallacy
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wut?
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Perhaps this chart might help to clarify:
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As you can see, it shows the difference between deductive and inductive arguments. Essentially
deductive arguments must be true as a result of their statements (aka premises), whereas inductive
arguments are a matter of probability or interpretation. Here’s an example of a deductive argument:
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All humans are mammals.
You are a human.
Therefore, you are a mammal.
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Now, in this syllogism if the two premises are true, then it necessarily means that the conclusion has to be true also. You see?
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Shut up, pls
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As I’ve started to explain argumentation,
I feel compelled to not leave you with
only a partial understanding
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Unsubscribe. Stahp. No more cat facts.
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Inductive arguments are the kind we’re more used to seeing, because they tend to be more ‘interpretive’
and a matter of opinion as to whether the argument is strong or weak, and the conclusion cogent. For an
inductive argument to be cogent, it must have true premises and its structure must also result in a high
probability of the conclusion being true. Here’s an example of an inductive argument:
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You are evidently angry and rude. Many people cover up their own insecurities by
attacking others. Therefore I think it’s probable that you are an insecure
person who vents their aggression on the internet.
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ORLY? So like this? You are a smarmy condescending idiot, therefore shut up
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Well, yes - that does somewhat prove my point, but it
isn’t a very good argument. It’s a non-sequitur, meaning
‘does not follow’ logically. To create a coherent
argument with a cogent conclusion the logic has to
follow a clear path of reason. Ironically, when both
parties are constructing good arguments, it means that
their discussion is usually less like an argument (in the
common sense) and more like A Civil Conversation
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I don’t want a civil conversation, I want an argument, and if you can’t give me one then pls go punch yourself in the face
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